Thursday, June 26, 2008
Spider-Man Dead, Surprising Prime Suspect
A couple of weeks ago, the story of Peter Parker grossly making out with Paris Hilton hit the tabloids with devastating results for poor Mary Jane, former wife. We knew the Peter-Mary Jane love story hit a striking halt in the chronicles of their lives (see Amazing Spider-Man for current events), but it looks like the ultra hot top model still had it for our friendly neighborhood and she just couldn't have him cheat on her, or move on, whatever suits you best. So, what did happen? The body of our arachnid friend was found lying on the floor definitely dead, with his arms and legs upward, like a dead cockroach. The depicted image above is an all-ages dramatization of the event, because the real scene was too disturbing to publish online. Right next to him the police found a jar of Baygon® Crawling Insect Surface Spray. So far, we learned the product does really work.
Now, the surprising part was that one of our sources (yeah, we do have lots and lots of sources) saw a red headed foxy lady run out of the place just minutes before the body was found by the pizza boy, who swears he's not delivering again to any super-hero. Speculation says that the red headed woman was no other than Mary Jane, but with current continuity flips, we just wouldn't know.
Stay tuned as this story continues.