Friday, October 31, 2008

She-Hulk Feels Confident

There's only been a couple of days since the voting started to pick which superheroine will be eliminated from the America's Next SuperModel contest. So far, no one has voted against She-Hulk and she thinks no one will.

"Fans adore me. There's been a couple of them who even said they would be supporting me 'til the end, so, I'm quite confident I'll get a free pass into the next episode."

"Is there anything else you'd like to say to the other contestants?"

"Why waste my time?" She said while winking behind her Halloween mask. Of course, no one noticed. We're just assuming. "If I was Emma Bishop I'd worry to go the way of the Dodo. But since I'm not, it's Halloween night." And then, she did a furious impression of the Hulk hitting her chest, a move that didn't look quite furious, but sexy instead.

Check how the contestants performed in their first challenge:
She-Hulk, Barbarella, Emma Bishop and She-Ra
Betty Boop, Huntress, Giselle and Mystique
Zatanna, Red Sonja, Aeon Flux and Squirrel Girl

And vote here:

Get your own Poll!

Darkita Wishes You a Horrible Halloween!

If you see Darkita in the middle night, looking at you with frightening eyes, walk aside, she might freeze you with her stare and if you've been a bad boy (or girl), she might blow you a kiss.

Find more Darkita e-cards at

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Emma Bishop About To Get The Ax

The cast of America's Next SuperModel is going through the elimination phase of their first episode and people are already voting on whom they want to be eliminated. So far, Emma Bishop is performing the worst.

"How does it feel to be the weakest link of the entire show?," one of our star journalists asked her.

"That's so rude! I'm not eliminated yet. The voting can turn around any moment."

"And if it doesn't."

"It will, I'm almost a goddess, they just won't get rid of me that easily."

"They did get rid of your Ruse comic book."

Emma slapped our interviewer. We're seriously considering about suing her, but we do hate our journalist as well.

The Authentic Batfan

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

America's Next SuperModel EP 01-Part 5: Who Will Be Eliminated?

Twelve superheroines did their best in the latest challenge and now it's up to you to decide who gets eliminated. You have one week to cast your vote!

Want to see how each of them fared? Check out the previous segments here:
(EP01-P1) (EP01-P2) (EP01-P3) (EP01-P4)

Get your own Poll!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Drop Dead Gorgeous Buffy

The entire staff of Comics All Too Real is speechless. Actually, no one is actually working because they're all watching the entire series composed of 7 wonderful seasons of action galore and funky dialogues. And in Spanish!

Sarah Michelle Gellar should just slap herself and go back to who she really was, but hey, she still thinks she can do other stuff. Yeah, like playing Daphne in Scooby Doo's movies.

If you stop eating for the next couple of weeks but you still afford to get this wonderful pack, it will be worth it. After all, food is definitely overrated.

Monday, October 27, 2008

America's Next SuperModel EP 01-Part 4: Cheerleader who?

Previously, on America's Next SuperModel (EP01-P1), (EP01-P2), (EP01-03), the second batch of four superheroines faced the challenge of saving four cheerleaders falling out of 20th floor windows, and while the Huntress and CrossGen's Giselle managed to save theirs, Betty Boop failed while still looking beautiful and Mystique tricked everyone into thinking her cheerleader survived when she really did not.

Today, a new group of four super-heroines will do their best to succeed on this task. Keep on reading.


When Zatanna arrived it was a pandemonium. Dozens of paparazzis arrived to the scene and started to take shots of the superheroine as she walked out of her carriage. Fishnets do have that effect in men and she was well aware of this. With a glance she noticed a blonde girl falling off a building and, while she winked at a photographer she said: "Ednolb eht evas!" She waited for a few seconds that were followed by a strong "THUD!"

"Oops!," said Zatanna as she shrugged. "She must have been a fake."


It was evident the She-Devil with a sword wasn't all too comfortable with this show. We don't know why she joined, but now that she was here, she wasn't going to fail.

And there she was, in front of a giant castle, er, building, and a young lady falling off of it. Red Sonja ran as fast as she could, but when she realized she wasn't going to make it, she threw her sword against the girl and pinned her to the wall. It was painful, quite painful, but the cheerleader managed to survive.

"Get me off of here!", screamed the cheerleader.

"Oh, ungrateful witch!", complained Red Sonja as she was getting back into her limo.


Some judges say Aeon Flux is too thin to be a superhero and that she might send the wrong message to young girls. Well, they might be right. When Aeon Flux arrived in a motorcycle to the site of her challenge, she saw the cheerleader falling off the building and jumped around with moves that matched both a spider and a panther. As if she was one of the Flashes, she arrived just in time to intercept the falling girl, and she did grab her, but they both fell down because of the blonde's weight. Aeon Flux barely managed to survive, but the girl didn't.

With an annoyed look she stared at the camera crew and made a gesture with her fingers that we're not allowed to reproduce.


It was Squirrel Girl's chance and she arrived just in time covered in squirrel fur and showing her all new squirrel nails. She was ready for anything, and as soon as she noticed the falling cheerleader, she whistled and thousands of squirrels came out of nowhere and created the most comfortable flying cushion that covered the blonde and landed as if surrounded by a soft bag of air. Squirrel Girl arrived to the scene of the saving and allowed all of her furry friends to surround her as she enjoyed the extent of the photo shoot. Too bad the cheerleader was allergic to such little animals.

"It could be worst," said Squirrell Girl with a smile.

Up next, you decide which superheroine gets eliminated. Stay tuned!

Blue Beetle in No Heroics?

It was said that he was dead, but our secret sources found out that a very healthy and living Ted Kord got contacted by the executive producers of the British show "No Heroics" and he's been offered a spot in the sitcom.

"The Blue Beetle is just the perfect candidate this show. He has a natural talent. He will be my sidekick", said co-star The Hotness. While some other heroes might take this offer the wrong way, we found out Ted Kord was incredibly happy about it. Will this deal come true? We'll let you know.

In the meanwhile, Comics All Too Real highly recommend this ITV show. Just be careful. It's not for kids!

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Birthday Like Lightning!

Comics All Too Real's Chris celebrated his birthday this weekend surrounded by some of his best friends and the whole event was crowned by a Flash cake much with such style that it should be mentioned by the Great White Snark ;)

The party included a Superman piñata, Spider-Man balloons and wonderful gifts such as a Flash and a Green Lantern t-shirts. The funny thing was that no kid was around yet all the guests managed to overcome this little detail.

All in all, a great party. It's always great to see grown-ups enjoying themselves like kids.

Friday, October 24, 2008

America's Next SuperModel EP 01- Part 3: Tricky Girls

Previously, on America's Next SuperModel (EP01-P1), (EP01-P2), four superheroines tried to save four cheerleaders that were thrown out of 20th floor windows. While Emma Bishop and Barbarella saved their girls, She-Hulk and She-Ra failed miserably.

Today, a new group of four super-heroines will do their best to succeed on this task.


The sexy icon of the 30's arrived in a black limo just in time to see the blonde cheerleader fall. Betty stared at the girl for a nanosecond and reacted as quickly as she could, doing all kind of poses in front of the camera, displaying the girl falling right behind her.

Betty managed to perform 15 incredible shots before the cheerleader splattered against the floor.

"I'm so sorry for her, but if I weren't going to save her, the least I could do was being pretty while failing." Said the contestant while the photographer nodded in agreement.


If there's something to say about the Huntress is that she's efficient. As soon as she arrived, she shot her rope against the building and against any law of physics or logic, she balanced herself right into the trajectory of the falling cheerleader. The Huntress grabbed the girl by her waist and took a couple of mortal summersaults landing on the floor as if they were both weightless.

The cheerleader's hair was a mess, but Helena managed to keep her looks perfect in front of the camera. Toughening her voice, in a tone that reminded Batman in The Dark Knight Returns, she said. "I'm the Huntress." It was real sexy if I might add.


This first season we have two survivors of the CrossGen Universe. Giselle is the second one, and she's a Sigil Bearer with the ability of magics and hotness. As Giselle noticed the cheerleader falling to her death, the sigil in her palm glowed as she extended her hand and giant flowers rose from the floor, grabbed the girl and put her gently on the floor.

With moves that reminded Witchblade, Giselle combed the girl's hair with her hands. "I'm really sorry they put you through this. Thankfully I was around. What do you think about going wild tonight at disco in town? I know places," and she smiled.


When Mystique realized what the challenge was all about, she told everyone to stay back as she ran to the site where the cheerleader would impact. The blonde girl fell behind some trees and statues, but after a few seconds, we all saw the cheerleader walking to us with a sense of gratitude.

"Mystique saved me. She's wonderful," said the cheerleader, "please support her in this contest. She's just the best." And she walked into the building. A few seconds later, Mystique came out of that very same building. "I did great, didn't I?" There was something suspicious about her, but we let her go, after all, she saved the girl, didn’t she?

Up next, the last four girls will face this challenge. Stay tunned!

Aliens in America

Look who just joined the Tolchuk family.

A Skrull!

They invaded the Earth, they convinced us we wanted them, and now they're part of our daily entertainment. Poor Rajah still can't believe he got kicked off the show as a green newcomer took his spot. Expect some great changes this upcoming season as Justin learns to speak Skrull and the entire family watch their first slaughter.

And you'll be shocked as you find out who becomes the Skrull's new sweetheart.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Stormtrooper Mommies’ Choice

Darth Vader chose his minions well.

As part of his research, he interviewed each of the applicant’s mothers and each one of them admitted that they took very good care of their sons and daughters, by providing them with great nourishing meals and, most of all, by keeping them warm during the eerie space winter.

This year, the Vader Black Label Collection arrived with a cozy sweater which has been beautifully marketed towards Stormtroopers’ mommies. Our inside sources are telling us that the whole campaign has been a success.

So, if your son or daughter is a Stormtrooper, you can already pick your Christmas gift and we'll send it to you wrapped with the best of the dark side of the Force!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

America's Next SuperModel EP 01- Part 2: Falling Down!

Previously, on America's Next SuperModel, the first challenge was finally revealed as our twelve heroines were taken to 12 different locations, where cheerleaders were been thrown out of 20th floor windows.

How did our contestants do? Keep on reading.


Our green goliathress looked up in the sky and without questioning a thing, she jumped with all of her strength and speed towards the falling lady, just as she kept on smiling to the camera, since, obviously, besides the heroics, this also was a photo contest.

Too bad for Jenn, she gained too much momentum and, when she grabbed the falling cheerleader, both of them crashed against the building. It came as no surprise when our staff found out that only one lady made it—

With half a smile, the She-Hulk walked away of the scene, hoping not to be eliminated.

"Accidents happen, you know?" She said half pissed off.


Using some strange sort of science fiction eagle wings, Barbarella arrived and noticed the cheerleader falling off the building.

"Oh, my Gosh! She's falling." She observed for a few moments until she realized that girl would die if she didn’t do a thing. "If I don't do a thing, she will die!"

Barbarella flapped her weird eagle wings just as she did some super sexy poses to the camera. In some sort of 60's movie film continuity, she still managed to get there in time and grab the girl into her arms.

"Oh, my Gosh, you're so beautiful." Said Barbarella as she saw the cheerleader. "I'll have to kiss you." And she did.


Unfamiliar to most of the contestants, Emma Bishop, one of the co-stars of the now defunct Ruse comic book, part of the CrossGen line, was still surprised that she made it to the show when a new blonde cheerleader fell out of a window.

She looked around suspiciously, realizing her powers weren't meant to be revealed, but an innocent life was on the line. Her eyes glazed with orange energy and waves of wind flew towards the girl and stopped her fall until she touched ground as if she was a feather.

Elegant as always, Emma smiled to the camera proud of a job well done.

"Don't try this at home." She said looking at the camera.


Straight from Etheria, the Princess Adora arrived just in the nick of time to the site just in time to see the falling cheerleader. As quick as she could, she began her transformation into She-Ra.

By the time the transformation finished, the poor cheerleader was splattered on the floor.

"Oops," she said.

Up next, four more girls will face this challenge. Stay tunned!

The Lamented Spider-Man Ballad

Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever Quesada wants!
Crisis time any size, stories went just like flies!
Look out! There went the Spider-Man!

Did this happen? Listen, bud, he's got rewritten blood!
Did he marry Mary Jane? Take a look single time!
Hey there! There went the Spider-Man!

In the chill of night, at the scene of a crime
Like a streak of light, he forgot just in time!

Spider-Man, Spider-Man, out of continuity Spider-Man!
Mary Jane she's ignored, action is just no more!
To him, life is like a big clon!
Wherever there's a retcon, you'll find the Spider-Man!!!

Sing along with the original song:

The Spider-Man art belongs to Jonathan Edwards.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Batman's New Secret Identity

The news is out and you're the first to hear it. And of course, you read it on Comics All Too Real!

During the night he's Batman, during the day he's a house.

This new secret identity is meant to baffle all of the regular journalists, thankfully we're so beyond that!

Monday, October 20, 2008

America's Next SuperModel EP 01- Part 1: Save the Cheerleader, Save Your World!

After lots of debate and staff change, finally the America's Next SuperModel show is on, and tonight: our first challenge.

Twelve beautiful superheroines have been sharing rooms at the all-new all-different Hall of Justice and, after a few run-ins against each other that we'll tell you about in an upcoming segment, the first challenge is finally on.

G'Nort Mail!

All of the girls met at the War Room and Barbarella read it out loud:

"Cheerleaders are often known to be immortals, they might cheer for your cause or flunk it."

The girls exchanged glances and Emma Bishop was the only one who didn't have a question mark on her head. After a little orange glow in her eyes, she smiled. Of course, being in her path to "godhood" granted her some kind of special sight.

In no time, 12 helicopters arrived to the Hall of Justice and our contestants took 12 different paths. All of them where left on the street, right next to a really big building, while they got handed a new cue card:

"Look up!"

The next they knew, a cheerleader was thrown out of a twentieth floor window.

In our next segment, you'll see some heroic rescues and some very lamented failures…

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Meteoro Sets NaNoWriMo On Fire

It's true, Meteoro will join National November Writing Month, but little does he know that not only he won't be the main character of his story, but he won't be his strip-funny self either and he will be involved in such heavy drama that he'd wish he'd stayed in cartoon form.

Just like in the old days, when he used to be a character in so many Roleplay Games, Meteoro will come alive and it won't be fun.

Comics All Too Real chose to participate in NaNoWriMo and we decided to invite you all as well. To write an entire 50.000 words novel in November will be a tough task, but a novel writer within you might be waiting for this opening. Click on the link above and join the fun!

Friday, October 3, 2008

Meanwhile-- The Legion of Doom!

It's been said that kids have been empowered and formed the all-new all-different Legion of Doom. If you have kids, don't let them wear funny costumes, they might be training in secret and plotting against you.


Thursday, October 2, 2008

Betty Boop: What's your superpower?

As the "America's Next SuperModel" competition starts rolling, we got to see Tyra having a personal talk with one of the most unusual contestants:

Tyra: When you decided to enter ANSM, did you know this was a superhero contest?
Betty: Yes, I knew.
Tyra: And what's your superpower?
Betty: I'm supercute.

(Cricket sounds broke the audio.)

Tyra: Do you think that will be enough to make you last in the competition?
Betty: Can I answer your question with another one?
Tyra: Go ahead.
Betty: Which one of other contestants have lasted almost a century under the spotlight?

(And Tyra just smiled.)

Tyra: I wish you luck, Betty, because the competition will be real tough. A little advice, though, you should wear a hat or something, your plus size head might scare away the innocents you'd want to save.

NEXT: The first challenge begins!