Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Lady Gaga Loves Kermit
One of our paparazzis got this lucky shot, displaying Lady Gaga's and Kermit's unprecedented love. So far, Lady Gaga has been accused of zoophilia, which is the practice of sex between humans and animals, but we still don't have proof since this could be just a stunt to gain some more media attention. We're still checking if this is even legal. As long as they don't want to get married, we guess they're not breaking any laws. You know, marriage is a privilege of only a few.
When confronted about their relationship, Lady Gaga just yelled "Leave us alone!" Of course, we wouldn't stop there, but it was fun to see her struggle.
We continued with our press-stalking for a few days until we ran into a very discombobulated Lady Gaga (yes, we always wanted to say "discombobulated" in an actual article). She was broken hearted. That's when it hit us, they had broken up. Turns out Kermit was just using her as a rebound girl.
We approached the famous singer very carefully. "So, we hear the frog likes pork much better." She broke into a burst of tears and we couldn't get an official statement out of her. All we got were some rumors about Kermit liking his girls chubbier. So, it didn't take us by surprise to see him back into the arms of Miss Piggy.
"I'm really sorry about Gaggy," admitted Kermit with a gesture of sadness drawn in his face, "but she's no Piggy, you know, I just love Piggy so badly." He seemed sincere and who can blame him? Piggy may have been found guilty of the AH1N1 disease, but she's a dear. Just ask her fans.